Mood Swings

I go from total boredom, listlessness and frustration ... to elation, purpose and motivation within minutes. That is what I mean when I say 'Guru gives light.' To the outsider, I may sound like a child, whose emotions are being easily manipulated ... but there's something to be said for 'positive manipulation.'

Anyway, for me, a simple sentence of encouragement will last me for weeks and weeks of positive energy, so I'll take it. And a sentence of discouragement ... will last me for weeks and weeks of 'I can prove you wrong, and therefore will work my butt off to do so.' So it's really a win-win situation now, isn't it?

Karmanye Vadhikaraste

Of course I didn't write while I was out in India ... there was so much going on, and had I actually written, it would have lent to some really great posts.

I've been back now, for over three weeks now. And nothing seems to be slowing down. As we creep up on our organization's 30th anniversary Performance & Gala, things are amping up at an exponential rate. And this is just a one night event ... I fear to think what it's going to be like when we are preparing for our Indian Classical Dance Festival -- Traditions Engaged ... which will be a 4 day event in SF, and a 3 day event in LA. I might lose a patch of hair, like my Guru-sister Seema did when planning our India tour!

Anyway, there are so many different areas to work on, and finding that focus and clarity is perhaps one of the biggest challenges right now. Last year, it was tunnel vision towards my solo. Having done that, now I am embarking on a path that has no set landmarks, no precedents to follow ... and so I am searching for that path ... there are ups, and there are downs, like in any quest. But I am believing more and more strongly in the philosophy of the Gita: Karmanye Vadhikaraste Ma Phaleshu Kadachana, Ma Karma Phala Hetur Bhurmatey Sangostva Akarmani.'

Translation: You have a right to perform your prescribed duty, but you are not entitled to the fruits of action. Never consider yourself the cause of the results of your activities, and never be attached to not doing your duty.

That, coupled with a strong faith in one's Guru ji -- and there is no sawaal (question), no jawaab (answer).

Touring with the Company

Yet another long hiatus for my blog! I head out for India tomorrow ... and as usual, I am slacking on the packing and completing the to-do list ... and instead am writing on a dead blog. I'm frankly not excited about going to India at all ... I've been there too many times in the last couple of years. But I am excited about touring with the Chitresh Das Dance Company! We'll be performing 2 shows in Kolkata, 1 show in Mumbai, Pune, and Bangalore. I've actually never been to Pune or Bangalore, though I imagine I will hardly see any of these cities, considering the Mumbai-Pune-Bangalore shows are on the 29th-30th-31st (respectively). It's going to be busy!! I'm also trying to coordinate a solo performance for myself in Delhi in the first week of February. That's the performance I'm most stressed out about, to say the least.

Ok, off to India ... I hope to try to post things while I'm out there!

Just a few weeks away

My first traditional Kathak solo is just 28 days away ... yes, I am counting the days. I remember when I was counting how many months were left ... where has the time flown? I don't even know what to write about this exactly ... I'm practicing whatever I can, however best I can, and am waiting for the day that Guru ji sees what I've been working on, and gives me feedback ... i.e. changes it all. Guru ji had said that when choosing pieces for the solo, there should be one piece that is a risk, and very challenging for you. I'm trying to figure out which piece that is for me, because at this point, they all feel like they're over my head. (Sigh!) Keep plugging away ... and it'll fall into place at some point.

Refreshingly Different

Fine Acting Can't Save Straight

Heading out to India

I'll be heading out to India day after tomorrow. Naturally I haven't packed a single thing yet. Me, Kingsuk and Labonee will be going via Emirates to Kolkata. In our 7 hour layover in Dubai, we're going to hop out and do dinner with Smita :-) I'm looking forward to that. 

And then .... the craziness will begin! Labonee and I will be in India for three weeks with Guru ji, training for our upcoming solos (Oct 30th for me, Nov 22nd for her). 

A general schedule of the day will be waking up at 6am, practicing for two hours (footwork, w/o ghungroo), and then doing breakfast with Guru ji at 8am, when we have chai, samosas, toast, and fruit -- while planning out the rest of the day. 

At 10 am begins the real practice. Guru ji dons his black sweatshirt and sweatpants in the 100 degree Kolkata weather, puts on his ankle weights, and starts going up and down the three storied house we live in (third story being the roof). He does this continually for about 2 hours ... no A/C, and the fans are switched off. In the meantime, we are dancing downstairs -- he can hear us throughout, and will yell at us if we start slacking or just messing up altogether. He periodically will start playing the tabla and dancing at crazy high speeds, expecting us to emulate, and we will just stare at him blankly, and he'll continue his stair climbing. By the end of two hours, the floor has been wiped down several times from puddles of sweat, and exhaustion doesn't even begin to describe how we feel. Mind you, I am telling you this based on the time I went to India in the winter, when it wasn't even that warm ... I really can't imagine how I'm supposed to dance in that heat. 

So then we'll shower, eat lunch together, and go onto our daily errands ... this time Labonee and I have to get a lot of costumes made -- both for ourselves, as well as the costumes for the 'Sita Haran' that the Chitresh Das Dance Company is putting on in the end of September. And you know how it is in India ... getting one task done takes the whole day. 

In the evening, we have another class ... this one shorter, but not necessarily less intense. This is followed by another shower, dinner, and then downtime before collapsing to sleep. The 'downtime' is the only time I used to ever have to call Kingsuk, when he would be in America and I was out there ... we never talked more than 5-10 minutes. This time, Kingsuk will be in Kolkata for the first 10 days at his mother's place, so that won't be so much of an issue. 

Anyway, I'm very excited about the journey ahead. I'm praying that I don't injure myself from the extreme dancing, and come back strong, and ready to conquer my solo!!